I'M LISTENING TO ZAMFIR. I HAVE TO ADMIT -- IT'S NOT AS BAD AS I HAD FEARED.

OH, I REALLY LOVE WHEN FAT PEOPLE TALK ON AND ON ABOUT GOING TO THE GYM THIS AND THEIR TRAINER THAT. DO THEY THINK THAT IF THEY TALK TO YOU ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY WORK OUT YOU'LL JUST FORGET THE FACT THAT THEY'RE FAT?

MONEY ISN'T EVERYTHING BUT IT SURE KEEPS THE KIDS IN TOUCH!!!

SHIT. I'VE MAYBE RUN OUT OF THINGS TO SAY. I'M THINKING REALLY HARD ABOUT THIS ONE.

OK, OK, HOW ABOUT AN OLDIE BUT GOODIE:

IS THAT ALL THERE IS?

PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DOING MY "WISH FOR MONEY AND THEN IT APPEARS TRICK". A READER FOUND 11 DOLLARS. AND THAT'S REAL US DOLLARS, NOT DOLL-HAIRS, I THINK.

PEOPLE REALLY DO WIN!

THINK ABOUT THIS ONE, FRIENDS:

A FRIEND IS SOMEONE WHO DOES THINGS THAT COUNT - BUT NEVER STOPS TO COUNT THEM.

IT SURE DOES MAKE THE DAY LONG WHEN YOU GET TO WORK ON TIME!

PEOPLE HAVE OFTEN SAID I'M RUDE.

BUT I'M NOT RUDE. I'VE GOT CAT-I-TUDE!

ACTUALLY, I HATE CATS.

MONEY TALKS! MINE SAYS GOODBYE!

ANYONE WHO SAYS MONEY CAN'T BUY HAPPINESS DOESN’T KNOW WHERE TO SHOP!!!!

I GET SO INSECURE ABOUT MY SOCKS SOMETIMES.